“I certify that I have examined the above named applicant according to the medical standards provided by Carnival Cruise Lines…”

“…and can attest this applicant has completed all required tests and with a full physical examination, I have identified no reportable deficiencies, other than those listed above [none].” — Juan A. Escobar, M.D.

Clearly he hasn’t heard me play, but not bad for 41, eh?

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