Go Around Back

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ten to nine and i’m in a fit
i’m almost late for a nine-o-clock hit
the band leader gave me some directions
that could’ve used a few corrections
i get to the gig, flag the valet
and here’s what he had to say

go around back
through the alley
by the dumpster
on the loading dock
to the back door
through the kitchen
past the men’s room
around the bar
that’s where you’re gonna play
and that’s where you gotta stay

i hit the bandstand like a brick
the first set went by pretty quick
by then i had a powerful thirst
and a nice cold beer wouldn’t be my first
i asked the bartender to help me out
and that man began to shout

by the second set i was famished
so the kitchen staff made me a li’l sammich
it tasted like it had been kept in a vault
yet the potato chips were seasoned with a hint of salt
now where do you think i got to eat
well, it wasn’t the cat-bird seat

now when i die i hope to go upstairs
i’ll settle down in one of their heavenly chairs
’cause i’m sure there’ll be a little bit of a wait
before I get through the pearly gates
and i got a feelin’ before i get through
Old St. Pete, he’ll say “here’s what you do …”